Monday, November 9, 2009

Its all about the package !!!

Package is a biggest cause of apprehension for anyone nowadays. Be it a customer, a student, a boy looking for a girl and vice versa for companionship (read Live In) or perhaps marriage, and a company hiring people. They look for the paramount package deal in every aspect of life.
They want to draw out maximum by investing minimum; yeah they do the cost benefit analysis and ROI (tools used to make a business case) and then buy, invest or acquire the product or service {depends on situation:) }.

A customer invests his time and money in the market searching for the great package deal (product). One on One free offer is the best offer one can get but unfortunately not every company has deep pockets to provide this luxury to customers. But who the f**k cares for customers, every company aims to make profits, by hook or crook, by fooling their customers to believe this the best product or package they can ever get to suffice their needs(Desires). A customer lives in a fool’s paradise that he is the King; truth is he is just a part of system, acting like a slave and generating profits and revenues for the companies.
Another kind of package is what a student (learners-a wrong dictionary meaning) look at or craves for.
A student (a grad or a post grad) invests his effort, money and time again for a great package. He wants to get the maximum to satisfy the desire of living a lifestyle which is a delusion created by companies to sell their own products or what they call package deals. For them a package is a must to live a lifestyle which is pleasurable and amusing (Desires- Sex, alcohol and drugs).”Quote: There is no point in living if you cannot feel alive” – this is used as a justification for living such a lifestyle and that in turn rationalises the desire for enormous package.
As in life one things leads to another (you know what I mean ;)) so is the case here. One package leads to another package. As one satisfies the need for one kind of package for some time the search for next starts or in some cases is done simultaneously.

This package is more of high risk investment without a little chance diversification. I hope you might have guessed it by now, if not I am making it explicit. The package here I am referring to is either a girl or a boy.

A girl or a boy looks for a complete package in the opposite sex. They just want everything in that person. Tall, dark (fair) and handsome or hot, good looking is an undefined vital prerequisite to be even looked at or pass the screening test of eyes. Customization is the order of modern times. Every package deal is subjected to this. So, is the case with this package. Finding a suitable package in itself is a project management exercise in itself with continuously changing environment variables Budget (how much you can spend), time (time you can invest waiting for the D-Day).
People want to change others to suit their needs (desires) and make them a perfect package for themselves. They exercise this option of tweaking as if customizing and ordering a product online.

A company hiring employees also look for a complete package. They want the person to have a gamut of skills and adaptability to use him as and when required for various jobs. These hiring decisions helps them in hiring some suckers who do not have to work to get paid, but just have to come to the premises, give rest to their a** and go back.

Parking your a** can get you a package, slogging your a** can get you a package.

What kind of an ass you want to be, it’s your choice and as the quote says.. we are here to understand the choice.

Wednesday, August 19, 2009

MBA - What it does to you ?

MBA - Some people call it Master of Business Administration and some call it Master of Bad Activities... A student who enters the campus to become an MBA grad, wants to learn a few things (not everything which you study is applicable in life) and land in a job which can get him an excellent package.. Ultimate result of this whole torture of two years is "Package" which everyone will get but of different value.. Each one will look at each other's package and will yearn for more..

During these two years, a student’s persona changes completely. The day they enter campus, they start thinking small of other people.. People are made to work in teams which lead to big problems.. ego issues, "I am always right" attitude, "I have done all the work" statements cause big furore among team members.. Even a small argument raises tempers.. people always sharpen their axes to slice other throats ( sarcastic comments) which some poor souls can't even survive..

Committees are formed to create an illusion that someone is working for students and will take care of their interests.. but... ?

The word friend takes a very different meaning.. people come to you if they have some work from you.. The thought of long lasting friendship which one used to have in days of graduation change totally. Friendship remains on the basis of assignments and projects..

Students make assignments as a cloth mill churns out cloth.. they go brain dead.. (Zombies)

People who hate others are made to work in a team with them.. and bond like gel sticks to hair..

Some free riders get in the team as well who take credit of all the good work done by one person.. and in some teams people divide work according to whatever skills they have and survive this war of grade points..

In this grade point war people die.. (I mean not literally), or they are crucified..

The toppers of the class who satisfy their big inflated ego are the one responsible for the crucification of miserable ones..

People become sadist to their inner core. They derive fun out of misery of others. Any pain which they cause to others adds another feather to their hat of wounds inflicted upon others.

The placement seasons begins, and another battle starts in this MBA war.. people slit throats of others.. Everyone wants to get over the head of other.. at this point of time they forget the laws of demand and supply studied in Economics, Organizational behaviour etiquettes, and even the way to talk which they start learning from Kindergarten school...

Finally, everything finishes.. MBA curriculum ends. students realise that two years just flew.. They introspect what they have lost in life.. an opportunity to make many friends, an opportunity to do some things [cricket, soccer and bad activities [you know what i mean :) ]] which they may never be able to do later in their life.